HubSpot Plugin Announces Historic Breakthrough: Tracking Code Will Now Actually Track Things
Update fixes minor technical issue in which marketing analytics had spent five years operating as an elaborate decorative element.
CAMBRIDGE, MA—Calling it “a transformational leap forward for businesses seeking to know whether anyone has visited their website,” HubSpot released WordPress plugin version 11.3.69 Thursday, fixing an issue that prevented the tracking-code script tag ID and async attribute from being properly applied on WordPress 5.7 and later.
WordPress 5.7 was released in March 2021.
“We are thrilled to announce that our tracking code now contains the attributes traditionally associated with tracking code,” said fictional HubSpot Vice President of Script Tag Excellence Melissa Corcoran. “This improvement demonstrates our continued commitment to eventually noticing things.”
According to fictional company engineers, the issue was discovered after a customer asked why their $1.4 million marketing dashboard showed that every visitor since 2021 was a 38-year-old man named Direct Traffic.
The defective script reportedly remained embedded across thousands of websites, where it performed an important ceremonial function by reassuring marketing departments that data was probably being collected somewhere.
“For years, we assumed the missing information meant customers were moving through a complex, nonlinear buyer journey,” said fictional digital strategist Brent Halverson while presenting a funnel labeled Awareness → Consideration → Unknown Technical Problem. “It turns out the buyer journey was simply entering the website and immediately disappearing into the fucking void.”
HubSpot emphasized that the missing async attribute did not prevent companies from continuing to generate detailed reports. It merely ensured those reports were based on partial data, browser guesswork, duplicated contacts, and whatever conclusions the marketing director had already decided to present.
The update’s changelog contained a single bullet point:
Fix tracking code script tag ID and async attribute not applied on WordPress 5.7+
Industry analysts praised the company for fitting five years of silent technical dysfunction into one sentence with the emotional urgency of correcting a typo in a tooltip.
“This is why software updates are so exciting,” said fictional WordPress consultant Dana Price. “You click ‘update’ expecting a minor compatibility tweak, then discover the product has finally begun performing the central task printed on the box.”
At press time, HubSpot users were eagerly refreshing their analytics dashboards, where every missing conversion had now been retroactively attributed to “Organic Social.”
The tracking code has finally been fixed, allowing HubSpot to accurately determine that the person repeatedly visiting your pricing page was you.